The diagnosis

Pain and Suffering
4th January 2017
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The diagnosis

woman in depression

Sitting at that doctors office when I was 17 years old, hearing the words no teenager expects to hear… “you are infertile”…my world was turned upside down. A million questions were running through my head, at a pace I couldn’t cope with and everything turned into a blur.

At a time when I was still trying to find myself, my values and my goals in life, these words raised more questions for which I didn’t have an answer. I had never thought about whether I wanted to have kids or not, but having that option taken away from me upset me a lot. I questioned myself as a woman, my role in society and what it meant for all the dreams I hadn’t had yet but had already lost. How am I supposed to mourn the loss of something I never had to begin with?

Being raised a catholic, the diagnosis also made me question my religion and faith. What’s my role in a future intimate relationship when we know reproduction is not an option? Although that was not necessarily my belief, being raised a catholic made me wonder my religion’s view on this.

I wanted to feel normal and fit in…

How has your diagnosis made you feel? What questions showed up in your head you had never thought of? Let me know in the comments section below.

 

4 Comments

  1. Ash says:

    I wondered what i was, women have babies, i couldn’t. Did that mean i wasn’t really a woman?

    I wondered who would love someone who was “damaged goods”

    Thankfully i had very supportive family and found my soul mate who loved everything about me.

    • andreiatrigo says:

      It’s incredibly to see how infertility triggers the same questions in so many of us. It’s also so good to see how you had support around you and how you’ve found unconditional love! It makes such a difference to have people by our side X

  2. Karen says:

    I planned my whole prior childhood to get married and have 4 children. Diagnosis just shy of 17 derailed me a bit…for years.

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